By Twyla Adkins, PMP

Maybe it’s been a quiet thought or a loud alarm going off inside of you.
“Should I go to therapy?”

As a society, we’ve come a long way from the level of embarrassment I unfortunately used to feel whenever it was time for me to slip away for 50 minutes. But for some, there can still be some anxiety around therapy and the perceived stigma that comes with it.

Since we love self-awareness, here are some signs that you should see a therapist.

Signs you actually need therapy

When access to basic medical treatment like therapy starts to feel like it is reserved only for someone who has it really “bad”, it’s easy to start to wonder exactly who therapy is for. I got to talk to Marshaya Rountree, M.S., LPC, NCC, licensed professional counselor, founder of Giving Grace Counseling, and creator of The Guided Financial Wellness Journal.

“I believe therapy is for everyone, but especially for anyone ready to engage in the work of healing. Therapy works best when someone is open to reflection, growth, and doing the inner work that healing requires,” said Rountree.

So while yes, therapy can be helpful during extremely stressful times, therapy is for anyone who wants to improve an area in their life or is going through something they’d like to talk about.

“Sometimes we don’t need a crisis,” said Rountree, “just the courage to look inward.”

Maybe you’ve been sad, anxious, overwhelmed, or angry most of the time. “Little” things start to garner “big” reactions, or you’re either feeling too much of everything or nothing at all.

Or, you’ve been looking for the mute button on your thoughts that are stuck on a loop, replaying events or conversations in your head, or wanting to stop the intrusive thoughts that pop up while you’re sitting in traffic.

You could be finding yourself speaking harshly or negatively to yourself, thinking that you’re not “good enough” or worried that “no one cares”.

Sleep could suddenly be your biggest opp or best friend- sleeping too little or too much. For some, sleep can become a way to cope; for others, coping might look like using substances, work, food, or doomscrolling to numb out or escape from reality. With everything going on in the world? The urge to escape is relatable.

Or, you’ve recognized some unhealthy patterns in your relationships that you want to change, you want to strengthen your communication or attachment style, or you’re feeling misunderstood in your day-to-day life.

Maybe after a change or loss in your relationships, job, health, or living arrangements, you’ve found yourself avoiding people, places, or things that used to feel manageable or even enjoyable. “In my work, I often support clients navigating anxiety, grief, and even financial trauma,” explained Rountree. “I’ve seen how powerful therapy can be when someone feels ready to face those layered parts of their story.”

If you need therapy, start here, bestie…

If you find yourself relating to any of this, then it’s a sign that you should see a therapist. And there’s no shame (or shade) in that. Reading about the different therapy styles will help give you a general understanding of the different therapy approaches, but it’s not required to get started.

Consider asking for a referral from a trusted friend or reaching out to a therapist in your insurance network. You can also try directories such as Alma, Headway, and Psychology Today. Rountree also suggests journaling about what you hope to address or better understand
in therapy.

What to look for in a therapist

Finding the right therapist is kinda like finding your new favorite hoodie. It might take a few tries to get it right, but when you find the right one, you’ll come back
to it again and again when you need it. “It’s a personal process, so give yourself permission to be selective,” said Rountree. “Spend some time reading the therapist profiles to look for someone whose approach, specialties, and values align with what you’re looking for.” Take advantage of the consultations offered (they’re usually free!) to briefly meet a few therapists and see if they’re a good fit before committing to sessions. “What matters most at the beginning is finding a therapist you feel safe and comfortable with – someone you can build trust and connect with. And don’t let unfamiliar terms hold you back from reaching out,” she added.

What to expect in therapy

It’s not uncommon to feel a little nervous before a therapy session. Don’t worry about saying the wrong thing or about being judged. “Therapy is a collaborative space, and your therapist is there to help you sort through what feels most pressing,” Roundtree states. Regardless of what you’re there to talk about, you won’t be untangling it alone. “Together, with your therapist, you’ll be able to come up with a plan, starting with the most immediate needs, then gradually and intentionally weaving in the other topics you’d like to explore,” explained Roundtree. “You don’t have to have it all organized or prioritized before you begin. Just come as you are.” Your therapist is likely to have their therapy session guidelines, but you can also find some
information on common therapy etiquette to help.

…if therapy isn’t for you

But what if you don’t need or aren’t ready for therapy? Don’t force it. “Therapy is most effective when someone is willing to participate,” Rountree advises. There are so many different effective tools for self-reflection, managing your emotions, and personal growth that you may already have available as alternatives to talk therapy.

Here are some suggestions:

• Journaling (Rountree created the Guided Financial Wellness Journal for those navigating both emotional and financial healing in mind)
• Listening to self–help podcasts
• Reading supportive books
• Joining support groups
• Engaging in physical wellness activities (think biking or yoga)
• Leaning into mindfulness (I like to use this as an excuse to get outside and touch grass)
• Seeking spiritual guidance

“Healing and growth don’t always start in a therapist’s office; there are many supportive tools available depending on what you need and what season you’re in,” Rountree added.

When to seek help

I must tell you, though, that if you – or someone you know – starts having thoughts of self-harm, suicide, or overall feeling of not wanting to exist, feel unsafe with yourself or others, or is having trouble figuring out what is and isn’t real – there is help available and you’re not alone. You can contact the National Alliance on Mental Illness (NAMI) at 800-950-NAMI (6264), send an email to info@nami.org , or call the National Suicide Prevention Lifeline by calling 968 for help. The NAMI HelpLine is a free, nationwide peer-support service providing information, resource referrals,
and support to people living with a mental health condition, their family members and
caregivers, mental health providers, and the public.

The feeling that you’ve been getting? That you haven’t been feeling like yourself or that there may be something wrong? It shouldn’t be ignored. If there’s something that you’d like to work through or get off your chest, therapy is a safe space to start.

“Sometimes healing begins when we take that first step, even without having it all figured out,” said Rountree. Whether you decide to start therapy or look into alternatives, what matters is that you take one intentional step toward your well-being, giving yourself grace, knowing you can begin again.”

This interview has been edited for length and brevity.

---

Marshaya Rountree, M.S., LPC, NCC, is a Licensed Professional Counselor, Assistant Clinical Director at Agnes Scott College, and the founder of Giving Grace Counseling, a private practice rooted in trauma-informed care and financial wellness. She is also the creator of The Guided Financial Wellness Journal.

Twyla Adkins, PMP, is a wellness writer, multiple sclerosis advocate, and business strategist who writes about the lived realities of chronic illness, neurodivergence. Her work – featured by outlets like NBC News – blends lived experience with strategic insight, uses words to connect us, make sense of what hurts, and remind us we’re not alone. When she’s not writing, you can find her sneaking a book into her bag, making obscure movie references, or planning her next trip.